Here we are in 1994 - me and my dear friend Douglas, my partner at the time. This photo was taken at one of the art exhibitions we curated for our art magazine The Exhibitioner. The magazine was a labor of love and even though it was mostly my brainchild, I couldn’t have done it without Douglas who helped me make decisions, fold pages, fold covers, distribute issues in person from Manhattan to the Hamptons, hang shows, and host openings and special events. We were partners in many ways.
Last week Douglas was in a car accident that instantly took him from the world and I have been crying ever since. He was a unique and gentle soul. We spent fourteen years together as a couple and remained friends after we parted ways in 2006. He moved to Florida and devoted his life to taking care of animals and the environment. He still made music when he had a chance. He was many things - musician, artist, poet, scientist, astronomer, jewelry designer, gemologist, animal lover, and nature lover. So much more…. it is so hard to properly describe anyone in words, as we all have depths and layers and complexities that cannot be quantified, only felt.
I have so many memories of the things we did and laughs and smiles and jam parties and fun, interesting things we participated in like an art fashion show at Outrlimits in Franklin Square in 1994. There is a video of that on my YouTube channel. Douglas didn’t drive, for some reason he refused to get his license and I’m not sure if he ever did, but we went a lot of places. Fortunately I like driving. We went south to visit my friend Martha Briggs in Virginia and drove to Kitty Hawk, NC one day to drop off my art piece titled “Celestial Transport” to a gallery. We also traveled north to visit his family, making a stop first in Salem, MA and then drove north to NH and spent a day at the Scottish Games in the White Mountains. We went into NYC a lot. We went to the IMF at NYU a few years in a row. We loved cats and had our own, and when there was a brief period when we didn’t have our own, we’d take care of other people’s cats for them. We had fun making music together. We had jam parties where Douglas would set up a drum kit and bring out instruments, including a box of percussion toys, some he made. I played a pink bass and he played many things so our friends could play what they liked. One time a friend came over with a shakuhachi which our friend played beautifully and our jam supported the beauty of that playing. So many things… Douglas’s first and only show with his “live rig” playing and singing his songs at Dr. Stella Russell’s Art Salon in Oyster Bay in 1994. His “live rig” was amazing, a tower of musical technology and it took five car trips to get all the gear there. He played keyboards, drum pedals with his feet, and sang at the same time. His songs were brilliant but unfortunately he never got around to recording them. That day was also my birthday so he planned a surprise birthday for me right after his show. At one point in the late 90’s. he worked for Danny Elfman and I was working part-time for Audrey Flack. We would meet afterward downtown in a small bar/club in the East Village where we’d watch many local bands while eating our $2 bowl of mashed potatoes. A funny memory - new yellow pants with a sulfur smell that made us call the fire department before we realized it was his pants causing the burning smell. He was what he called a “Moon baby”, having been born the day men walked on the moon, so we had a moon birthday party for him where he hooked up his telescope to a small t.v. so we could all watch the moon while eating cake I baked with moons and stars on it. I have so many memories. Drawing nights. Funny hats. Rescuing cats and birds. Escaping flying manhole covers. So many memories.
I could go on and on….. but I’ll end here.
I will miss him terribly. I spoke with him just a few weeks ago and before that for his birthday last month. There is no-one else like him. There is no-one like any of us, but some are truly more unique than others. He was one of those truly rare and unique souls. I’m still in shock.